Momo Grace You With Her Presence
by Now's The Chance
Summary: Momo doesn't really care what's going on. She just want to be independent. However, she hates her name. What kind of freaks name their child after a fruit! Do they want her to get bullied! But at least she's not named after a ramen seasoning. Seriously, what kind of name is Naruto?
1. Chapter 1: The Cute Little Peach

The Cute little Peach

The first thing I realized when my vision cleared, and I got my hand on a compact mirror.

_I had freckles._

Light brown specks on my nose and cheeks. Not too many that it's overwhelming, but the right amount. I also have a freaky load of hair on top of my infant head.

Literally, it's so poufy and thick.

My eyes also match the same color of my hair, a peachy pink.

At least it makes sense now why I was called Momo, I literally resemble a peach.

However, as cute as Momo is, I hope it's not my name. It's sweet to be called the sweetest and most delicious fruit to humanity, but it's so uncreative.

I put the mirror down and really hope Momo was just an infant nickname that will disappear as I got older.

…

No such luck, I came to the conclusion that my name really is Momo.

So uncreative.


	2. Chapter 2: Humiliating the Peach

Chapter 2: Humiliating the Peach

_He's being weird again._

I glance back at the man making kissing faces at me and looked away just as fast. I tried to scoot my diaper covered butt to move away from him, however it just look as if I am encouraging him.

Which by any mean, I am not. But the weirdo took it that way.

He laughs and scoop me into his arms. I could hear a lady laughing from where I assume was the kitchen.

"That's my Momo-chan~ Do you want to play with daddy more!"

_No, I really don't._

I shriek to show my displeasure; however, it sounds like an encouragement again. Damn stupid body.

I want the woman back.

She is unfortunately more physical with her affection, but she at least doesn't treat me as if I had an acorn for a brain.

_Says the devil's name and she will appear._

The woman took me from the man's arm and held me by her hip as she pinches the man's cheek. I tried to understand what she is saying, but her accent is so thick I had a hard time following. It seems to be a common issue for her. Whenever we go out other people barely understood her thick accent as well.

"But Aoi! She loves it! Don't you Momo-chan~" I stuck out my tongue.

The woman laughs and held me tighter as I tried to get her to put me down. It's a great convenience to be carried everywhere, but it gets humiliating at time.

The lady set me down on the small futon in the living room, I believed she warned the man to stop bothering me because he has been pouting ever since.

_Finally! I can get some peace and quiet._

But that didn't last long as the relaxation was too peaceful, and I let out a small fart.

I was mortified.

The man coos and shriek in happiness.

The woman laughs.

_Let this hell be over!_


	3. Chapter 3: Bargaining with the Peach

**Chapter 3: Bargaining with the Peach**

_No matter how much I think about, it is pretty._

The woman took me out today to the market. She was chatting with another house wife when I got bored and toddled my way toward the most colorful stand.

Her parenting skills could use some work, but at least I had more freedom.

I tried to walk my way toward the fruit stand and steal a peach. However, my lack of direction leads me to fall on my butt in front of a jewelry stall. My eyes are bedazzled with the shine of the endless gems varying from necklace, to earrings, and bracelet.

My sight fell upon the simplest accessory of the stall, a dark jade hair pin with a dragon design. The hairpin held no gem or pearl or fancy carving. Just a swirl design with the detailed dragon.

I like hair pin; the woman owns many and I would play with hers by putting them behind my ears (since my hair is still too short) or throwing them as if they were daggers. Hair pins are the greatest hidden weapon a woman can have.

I grabbed it with my cubby hands and fell back on my butt.

"Oh My! You young lady have a great eye!"

I glance to the old man who regarded me with pride.

… at least I think he did? This baby vision had not cleared up all that well yet.

"Not many young girls pay attention to that hair pin, you sure have great taste for someone so young, would you like to buy it?"

I pointed to my head "No hair." Which was a lie since my head looks like a peach-color marshmallow, but he gets my meaning.

He laughs "Well that's what growing your hair out is for!"

_Too bad, I quite like my short hair._

I knew I didn't need it, but I couldn't let it go. It felt smooth and interesting, plus it would look awesome when I stab a bad guy with it.

"…5 yen Oji-san."

"1000 yen."

"10 yen."

"1000 yen."

"50 yen."

"1000 yen."

"One hunded yen un this candy too." I held out a flatten taffy I found in the butt pocket of the man's pants, but I won't tell him that.

The Oji-san stared for a very long time.

After a while I thought he fell asleep and sadly put the pin back. His hand slam down on the stand, surprising me and he let out a huge laugh.

"Haha Kid! You're funny! Alright I accept your deal! 100 yen and that piece of candy please!" I nodded my head, happy my first bargain was a success.

I gave the Oji-san all my allowance and the candy and he put the pin into a small bag for me to carry. I toddled my way back to the woman who was explaining herself to the vegetable stand.

"Bye Oji-san! Danks for the present!"

"HAHA! Take care kid!" I excitedly waved my cubby arms; the bag slaps me.

As I walk toward the woman, I felt as if I ripped the Oji-san off with _way _too much money.

_Well he agreed to the deal. _

I shrugged my shoulders and swung my gift around.

_I can't wait to show the lady what I brought!_

…

The lady hid the hair pin away and promise to give it back to me when my hair gets longer… and when I stop finding sadistic pleasure stabbing the man.

He now fashion five tiny scars on the middle of his forehead.


	4. Chapter 4: Fuzzy Peach VS The Toilet

**Chapter 4: Fuzzy Peach VS… The Toilet**

_I don't know if it's the diaper, but my butt looks way too big._

I twirl in front of the long mirror, admiring my back view. The woman dressed me in a bright blue shirt and pink skirt that puff out like a ball gown. It would be cute if the skirt didn't make my butt look like an elephant.

I sigh, accepting my cruel fashion fate.

_I guess it's time to say good bye to diapers, how do one use the toilet?_

The man and woman are… busy at the moment and my ears are already red from me washing them out, so I didn't want to ask them for help.

Luckily, I have seen how one would use a toilet.

Unluckily it was who I saw that demonstrate it.

I stood in front of the white waterfall.

I stare.

I cross my arms.

I stare more.

I uncross my arms and pulled my skirt down, along with the diaper.

I walk.

I climb.

I got wet.

I sat.

I waited.

…

After they finish, the woman and man caught me leaving the bathroom with the toilet flushing behind me. I was rather proud of myself that I didn't drown in that toilet bowl.

However, the fact I fell inside the bowl will forever be a secret no one will dare to mention, ever!


	5. Chapter 5: Don't Tempt the Peach

**Chapter 5: Don't Tempt the Peach**

_I needed friends they say. I need to be around other children they say. _

So, what was the smart plan they came up with?

Ditching me in a park where everyone was taller and bigger than me. I was the perfect victim for a bully.

I stared as a kid ran after his friend, but he tripped and fell. He instantly burst into tears.

I scoff and look away in exasperation.

_Besides, I am way more mature than these morons._

I continue staring at the pile of small children. If you looked past the huge tears and glob of snot, they were kinda adorable.

"Hey! You come here!" I looked around and saw one of the children address me.

_Me? _I pointed to myself to which he nodded.

I was bored and didn't really want to stand around doing nothing, so I shrugged and walked to the big group in the middle of the playground.

"Sup." I said.

"Sup?" they repeated back at me.

_Aww, _they even tilted their heads like clueless puppies.

"Sup." A long silence stretches between the group of children and I until the kid who called me over shook his head (adorable), his hair fell over his eyes, but he didn't mind.

"Anyway, do you wanna play ninja with us? We need one more ninja." His smile is so gummy I just want to poke his cheeks.

The name of the games sounded unfamiliar to me "What's ninja?"

They all gasped like I just said You-Know-Who's name out loud.

"You don't know ninja!?"

"Nope."

"It's the best game everah!"

"Really?"

"Yeah, yeah. You catch criminal and kill then before they reach their secret place or else the village die!"

_… Wow, morbid much._

"So, I just gotta catch these criminals and win?"

"Yeah!"

_Huh, that doesn't sound so hard._

_…_

"Did you have fun sweetie?"

"I killed a criminal, but I'm pretty sure the boy I killed can't use his peewee anymore."

"AND… I won."


	6. Chapter 6: The Peach is (Un)Grateful

**Chapter 6: The Peach is (Un)Grateful**

Watching muted colored crazies jumping from roof to roof is somehow normal now.

_How did my life result to this?!_

Our roof is also freakishly close to the window as well.

_As if someone can climb in…_

_DING!_

Oh, I have a great idea!

…

"OH, MY GAWD! THANK YOU SO MUCH! THANK YOU!" I grumbled unhappily as my face is getting squished against the man's wet (slimy. Yuck!) cheeks. The lady is bowing to the pathetic being who ruined my plan.

"Momo, come thank this young shinobi from saving you." The man let me down and the first thing I did was clean my wet face into his pants.

They thought I was being shy, but I saw your eye Mister! He knew what I was doing and his mouth twitch! How dare he!

The man tug (pried) me off his leg and softly pushed me toward the Dick's direction.

"Hello." _If he wasn't so annoying, I can admit he's kinda hot… No! Focus!_

I crossed my arms "I hate you."

"MOMO!"

I was dragged back quickly with my two followers bowing down in honor to my superiority (No, they were just apologizing again. Weakling). I kept my stance, daring the dude to try me with my glare.

He stifle a laugh!

_THAT LITTLE…!_

"It's alright, as long as she's fine." His hand reached to pat my head… I turn my head and bit him.

Unsuccessful, since my hair is puffier than my head and I couldn't reach his hand, but he got the gist.

"MOMO! I swear this little girl!" They apologized one last time and picked my up. I kept my glare and his smile widen.

_That terrible bastard! (But GOD! Does that man have a hot smile! How is that possible?!)_

"I don't understand how you fell out of the window though Momo, you are always so careful."

"I wanted to try to do a superhero landing" I mumbled.

(But it had to get ruined by a dude who literally radiate as sunlight with his yellow, soft (I felt it) hair and just as sunny personality).

_Sigh, I hate ninja._

"I'm not gonna become a ninja."

The man tripped and fell to his face, killing me and having my soul leave my body for the afterlife as well (I wish).

**Can you guys guess who she met from the clues I left behind :D.**

**Thank you so much for reading this story! I wanted to try a short, humorous story that didn't center hugely on the plot. I know I was asked how the story would go and if she will meet some critically important characters.**

**I just want to say that this story is going to follow Momo and her life in Konoha. When and how she will meet our favorite characters depends whenever she wants (or don't want too).**

**I try to update at least once a month, so I'll see you next month!**

**~ Now's the Chance.**


	7. Chapter 7: Peach's Fur are Softer

**Peach's Fur are Softer than any Furs.**

The day I got my first pet, was a normal day like everything else.

The apartment felt suffocating after three days, so I ran away. I wasn't an energetic child, so I have no idea where I was running to or when I will find myself in danger.

Until my tiny Cinderella feet stopped in front of the iconic hilltop.

I moved my head to the right and squinted.

_Huh, it's not as high as I though. _

I looked to the sky and decide to take a lesson from the book and gave cloud watching a try.

The activity was a failed as all the clouds looked like the same shape of blob to me. But the damn fluffiness of it also reminded me of my own pillow. I think I fell asleep afterword.

I went to sleep on the hilltop as a tiny 20 pounds toddler but woke up feeling 30 pounds heavier.

The first thing I notice when I was awake, my five senses were tingling.

My sight is covered by white fur, my face is tingling from the soft fur, I can hear only loud purring, my nose is clog with the musky smell of flowers, and my mouth is filled with a big glob of fur.

It took me a while to realize I had a cat's butt on my face.

I struggle, trying to push the cat off. _Damn weak muscle!_

I gave up after two tries and flopped.

She got off only after I faked my death. A paw swipes my nose.

_Nya~_

One eye opened. The cat got the greatest face ever, a frown was permanently imprinted onto her furry face. "Damn, now I want you."

She (I checked) blinked back at me.

I took it as a yes.

"Hehe, ok let's go home" I try my best to pick her up with my tiny arms.

I couldn't carry her far, so the cat decided to find her comfy spot.

She settled comfortably, on top of my puffy hair.

I was certain the reason I almost fell several times on the walk home was because of her.

…

"Honey, what do you want name her?"

"Hmm… Serial Killer, since she tried to suffocate me."

*CRASH* "WHAT!?"


	8. Chapter 8: Peach is a Oustanding Citizen

**Chapter 08: Turning the Peach into an Outstanding Citizen**

I was bored.

The blocks brought entertainment for a while as they were a perfect tool to throw toward the man and leave it lying around for him to trip and fall, but by now he learned his lesson and always catches it or side-step the blocks.

How lame.

All I can do is play around with Serial Killer. She likes to sleep on my chest so I would watch her move along to my breathing.

It's pretty meditative because when I started the sun was still out, and now it was dark.

I was surprise Mo-the lady didn't bother me.

My boredom was broken by a tiny shriek. Usually I don't mind, but this shriek was _familiar _and _fearful._

I looked out the window and my boring night turned horrible.

_Is he…? No, no this village is filled with ninja. Don't bother. Someone will come help._

A rattle of buttons hits the ground as her blouse is rip open.

_They're be here soon._

A sound of a sharp object cut through her skirt.

_WHERE THE KAMI IS EVERYONE ELSE!_

A belt buckles.

…

The next morning, gossips spread about the disgraced shinobi (chunin) who was found with his body buried in the middle of the town square. His head was the only visible part and he had a sign taped on his forehead which shared his crime.

He was arrested and nobody found out who buried him (except, probably the higher-up ninja… things).

_I should probably tell the lady that Serial Killer "dropped" her plant through the window… and hide my sandbox shovels just in case._


	9. Chapter 9: The Peach Procrasination

**Chapter 09: A Peach does not have the Patience to Write (or ink)**

There was an idea, an idea to bring-

_Pfft. No, that's basically plagiarism._

I scrunched up the sheet of paper and threw it behind me.

_But technically, it isn't really- No! _

I huffed in frustration. The urge to plagiarize was very tempting. It's not as if they would ever know.

But I have a strong moral code. This girl doesn't take credit for no work but her own!

_But I'm stuck! _I glared at the empty page until I burned it with my eyes (or I think I did. My vision blurred when I stared glared too long without blinking).

I took my hair pin out from my hair (which I just stuck in wherever) and twirl it around on my fingers. It kept me occupied for a few minutes because I couldn't do as well with my tiny chubby fingers. But it kept me sane and not throwing out the table.

After that I tried to braid my hair in a style that covered my whole head. But I gave up because it was too puffy and way too short. My arms also got tired.

I practiced throwing my hair pin like as kickass heroine. A new bullseye decorates the living room wall. But it turned out to be a failed of a weapon because it was too heavy and didn't make it close to the bullseye. It might have to do with me being weak as well.

I then turned my fluffy head toward the kitchen. I looked at the clock. The lady and man are still out. The babysitter they hired was still knocked out cold from the tea. I moved his body onto the rug and I rolled him out of the way to the other side of the house.

With all this extra time of course I'm gonna make trouble. The damn homework can wait. I got some procrastination to explore.

I weight out my option. Recently the Lady had been into red fruit and I had a body at my disposal.

Red. Mushy. Body. Fun.

Oh yes, this will keep my time completely busy.

…

The lady and man appeared home with the house newly decorated as a crime scene and a fake murder scene with the babysitter's body covered in my homemade batch of (fake) blood.

Their reactions were priceless.

I decided to keep the writing for another.

**Hello everyone! I'm so sorry I missed last month's update. I had finals and exams to study for. But's it's over now. So, to make it up, I share two chapters! **

**I hope everyone is enjoying the story, Momo's adventures so far are purely full of fluff. See you next month~ **


	10. Chapter 10: The Peach's Investigation

**Chapter 10: The Peach's Search for Serial Killer**

Serial Killer was on the loose.

Although I tried to tame her urges, you cannot house trained a born savage. I looked at the damage she left behind.

A headless teddy bear with stuffing pooling around the body. Claw marks on the blanket and an open window. I concluded the man left the window open and forgot. Despite my many warnings not too due to Serial Killer's instinct.

He will be punished later.

I set out to find her before she takes advantage of some poor fool that had no idea what they're getting into. Since I turned five, they have been more lenient on letting me go outside by myself…. A yard away. But since HE let out a merciless horror during this unkeen time, I don't care.

I went to the market where I know I can find stray victims.

In my loudest voice I scream out "SERIAL KILLER!"

The market went dead silent. How respectful, now I can actually hear any painful yowls.

"SERIAL KILLER!"

The peace didn't last long as everyone started screaming and running away. I had to move to avoid getting trampled. Rude. But I didn't see any wandering fluffy cloud, so I follow the weird crowd.

I tried the park next. "SERIAL KILLER!"

Mothers screams and took their children home.

Sheesh lady, overreacted much?

I walked past office buildings. "SERIAK KILLER!"

The sound of feet pounding, panicked screams, and glass breaking followed behind me.

I found some weird land where people were fighting. "SERIAL KILLER!"

The people stopped fighting and stared at me. I stared back. Their pupil-less eyes freaked me, so I quickly tumble away screaming loudly "SERIAL KILLER!"

I tried the alleyway next "SERIAL- oh there you are… oh no."

There she was with another cat next to her, and a line of willing suitors waiting their turn. "SERIAL KILLER!" I shriek. "DO NOT TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THESE KITTEN!" I scooped her up, she yowls unhappily.

"I should neuter you, you Cougar." Her heat ended a week ago, but everyone wanted her attention. Boys wants what they can't touch. Can't blame her.

I carried her home. She comfortably adjusted herself on top of my head.

…

"Sweetie, did you lose S-Serial Killer today."

"Not me, the window was left open."

"Well, next time. Wait until mommy and daddy come home so we could find him together alright? You scared a lot of people today."

_Why?_

I played along with her "okay, sure."

The bedroom door close and I went back to my drawing.

*BONUS*

"We need to get her to change the demon's name."

"Ah wah! But Aoi! She chose such a great name!"

"She literally scared off half the village just by looking for her cat!"

"They do not appreciate Momo's creativity."

"The Hyuga complained."

"They always have a stick up their as-."

"Get her to change the name or you will never get to see me in the red _thing _again."

Aoi looked smug at her obvious win.

"B-but… Aoi!"

"Get Momo to change the cat's name, or no more sexy time."

The threat lasted a month. Sexy time was back, and Serial Killer was here to stay.

**I hope you guys enjoy this chapter. I'll see you again next month!**

**Now's the Chance.**


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